ANSWER ME THIS
attorney JOKES (random)
A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher.
The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed.
The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull.
The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store.
The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court.
The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking.
After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn't resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher, "You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there.
I couldn't have won the case.
The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning.
I didn't have one witness to put on the stand.
I bluffed you!" The old rancher replied, "Well, I'll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that durned bull came home this morning."
THE COMPLETE LIST OF FUNNY attorney JOKES:
1 - A salesman was testifying in
proceedings against his wife. "Please
describe," said... More ››
2 - A prosecuting attorney called his first witness,
a grandmotherly, elderly woman, to the stand. H... More ››
3 - A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad
in a lawsuit filed by
an old rancher. The ranche... More ››
4 - A defense attorney was
police officer during a felony trial -- it went like th... More ››
5 - A hillbilly walked into an attorney's office
wanting to file for
Attorney: "May I hel... More ››
6 - The local courtroom was packed
testimony began in the
sentencing hearing of a woman convicte... More ››
7 - Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced
the opposing lawyers.
"So," he said, "I have be... More ››
8 - Two attorneys went into a
diner and ordered
two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their... More ››
9 - A wealthy man sat in his attorney's
"Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?... More ››
10 - A
woman was being questioned in a court
trial involving slander. "Please
repeat the slanderous... More ››
11 - A tough case was being argued in court. The
feeling that he was in trouble, s... More ››
12 - Attorney to witness: "What was the
thing your husband said to you when he woke up that
m... More ››
13 - What does a Gorilla attorney study?
of the jungle!... More ››