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BIOLOGIST JOKES!

biologist JOKES (random)

An old mountain man in Arkansas was sick and bedridden. He had not been outdoors for a few weeks and had a sharp craving for a meal of wild squirrel. He summoned his half-idiot son into the room and instructed him to go squirrel hunting and bring him back a squirrel or two. He also told his son to be very careful not to shoot the squirrel in the head as he would need its brains later to "tan" the squirrel's pelt. (Tanning a skin using the animal's brains is a common practice in certain areas, it generally takes about one brain to tan one skin). The idiot son spent most of the day searching the woods for tree squirrels, but was not having any luck. Finally, high up in a sweet-gum tree, he spotted a squirrel's head sticking out from a hole. He remembered his Pa's admonitions to save the brains. After deciding he may not have another chance, he shot it in the head, thus ruining the brains. r His sick Pa was upset, "I can't tan that skin without no brains!" he said, "Now what am I a gonna do?" Thinking quickly, he remembered that up on the river there were 3 fisheries biologists doing some field work. "Well, we're only tanning one squirrel skin, walk up the river and shoot one of them dang fish biologists and I'll use his brains to tan the skin," he told the son. The son did as he was told and soon returned with the prize. As it turned out, the brain wasn't large enough and the boy was upset as he would have to make another trip to harvest the other two biologist's brains. "Look on the bright side, boy", the old man told him, "Two more ought to be just enough. We'd have been in real trouble if they was BOTANISTS!"

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THE COMPLETE LIST OF FUNNY biologist JOKES:

 1 - A logger is driving down the highway and sees two botanists trying to measure the height of a sm... More ››
 2 - A wildlife biologist is working in the woods, miles from the nearest town. He's camped alone wit... More ››
 3 - A group of goose biologists were meeting to brainstorm about the migration tactics of Canada g... More ››
 4 - A biologist was interested in studying how far bullfrogs can jump. He brought a bullfrog into... More ››
 5 - An old mountain man in Arkansas was sick and bedridden. He had not been outdoors for a few wee... More ››
 6 - A wildlife biologist crew leader has several crews, each consisting of two biologists. The crews... More ››
 7 - A biologist had been working on a remote research project in the Amazon jungle. Upon his retur... More ››
 8 - Ben was assigned a new wildlife technician and she was driving him crazy. She was blonde and pre... More ››
 9 - A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his zoology test the next day. As h... More ››
 10 - There were these two Engineers who decided they would go moose hunting in the backwoods of Briti... More ››
 11 - While driving down a steep and curvy logging road, a group of biologists loose control of their... More ››
 12 - Garvin the mammalogist, was in Alaska studying polar bear. In sub-zero weather, he would spend 7... More ››
 13 - A University had advertised for two biologists to help in their mammalogy department, specifical... More ››
 14 - A pair of biologists are studying terns on a rock island just off the coast. While walking on a... More ››
 15 - Two biologists are in the field following the tracks of a radio-collared grizzly bear. All of a... More ››
 16 - A young biologist was sitting on a stump at the edge of their camp. On his face was the saddes... More ››
 17 - A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his mother, "How was I born?" "Well honey...... More ››
 18 - A biologist from the North Pole was showing a new recruit the ropes of a polar bear radio tracki... More ››
 19 - Dan had been studying whales for over 20 years and had made some thrilling breakthroughs regardi... More ››
 20 - A young wildlife biologist got fired from his first real wildlife job. Upon his return home, his... More ››
 21 - A boy frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and his Personal Psychic Advisor tells him: "You are g... More ››
 22 - An 8th grade boy was doing some research for his career report at school. He asks his dad, "Fath... More ››
 23 - How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change it and three to wr... More ››
 24 - "A bloke walks into a pub, and asks for a pint of Adenosinetriphosphate. The barman says "That'... More ››
 25 - How many evolutionists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it takes eight millio... More ››
 26 - How do you eat a DNA spaghetti? With a replication fork (you can also use your zinc fingers...)... More ››
 27 - Q: How so you call a member of the finacial staff of the faculty of Biology? A: A Buy-ologist.... More ››
 28 - A couple of biologists had twins. One they called John and the other control.... More ››
 29 - Q: what's a biologists definition of a graph A: an animal with a long neck... More ››
 30 - Do molecular biologists wear designer genes?... More ››
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