1 - David received a parrot for his birthday. This
parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and te... More ››
2 - Why does a flamingo lift up one leg ?
if he lifted up both legs it would fall over !... More ››
3 - What did one chicken say to the other after they
walked through poison ivy ?
"You scratch my be... More ››
4 - What did the baby
chick say when he saw his
mother sitting on an orange ?
'Dad, dad, look what... More ››
5 - Q: Why did the chicken say,
bow-wow, and moo?"
A: He was studying foreign languag... More ››
6 - Why did the chicken cross
the road in
To show the opossum it could be done.... More ››
7 - What's another name for a clever duck ?
wise quacker !... More ››
8 - What kind of doctor does a duck
Ducktor.... More ››
9 - A man with a talking parrot is getting married. On
the day of the wedding he says to the parrot... More ››
10 - Late one night, a burglar
broke into a house
he thought was empty.
He tiptoed through the li... More ››
11 - A couple of pigeons made a
date to meet on
the ledge outside the tenth floor of a skyscraper. Th... More ››
12 - How many ducks would there be,
if you saw two
ducks in front of two ducks, two ducks between two... More ››
13 - "Look at that speed!"
said one hawk to
another as the jet fighter plane hurtled over their
hea... More ››
14 - What do you get if you cross
a giant, hairy
monster with a penguin?
I don't know but it's a ve... More ››
15 - What do you get if you cross a woodpecker
with a carrier pigeon ?
A bird who knocks before del... More ››
16 - Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls (bagels,... More ››
17 - What happened to the chicken whose feathers were
pointing the wrong way ?
She was tickled... More ››
18 - What do you get if you cross a bee with a
An animal that's always telling you how busy... More ››
19 - Did you hear about the chicken that wanted to
take ballet lessons?
"He wanted to be a hentertaine... More ››
20 - What's brown and white and flies all
Thanksgiving turkey, when you carve it with a chain sa... More ››
21 - What goes 'peck, bang, peck, bang, peck, bang'
A bunch of chickens in a field full of balloons... More ››
22 - Why were the hens lying on their backs
their legs in the air ?
Because eggs were going up... More ››
23 - Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and
You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."... More ››
24 - What do you call a rooster who
wakes you up
at the same time every morning ?
An alarm cluck !... More ››
25 - Why does a chicken coop have two doors
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!... More ››
26 - What did the baby owl's parents say when he
to go to a party?
You're not owld enough.... More ››
27 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
A bird that talks in morse code !... More ››
28 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
A bird that will talk you ear off !... More ››
29 - What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of
fried chicken ?
She kicked the bucket !... More ››
30 - Two owls were playing pool.
One said, "Two
The other replied, "Two hits to who?"... More ››
31 - Teacher: What's the definition of a
Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!... More ››
32 - What is the difference between a fly and a bird
A bird can fly but a fly can't bird !... More ››
33 - Teacher: Why do we put a hyphen in a bird-cage?
Pupil: For a parrot to perch on, miss.... More ››
34 - What did the parrot say when he was using the
P.Cs of eight, P.Cs of eight.... More ››
35 - What do you get if you cross an eagle with a
A bird that stinks to high heaven.... More ››
36 - How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land
With it's sparrowchute !... More ››
37 - What do you call a parrot when it has dried
after a bath?
Polly unsaturated!... More ››
38 - Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross
Because he didn't have enough guts... More ››
39 - Why did the chick
disappoint his mother ?
He wasn't what he was cracked up to be !... More ››
40 - Why is politics for the birds?
politiciands always parrot the same old lines!... More ››
41 - Why did the parrot wear a raincoat ?
she wanted to be a Polly unsaturated !... More ››
42 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
A great walkie-talkie !... More ››
43 - Why did the chicken cross the basketball court
He heard the referee calling fowls... More ››
44 - What do you call a chicken that crosses the road
without looking both ways?
Dead.... More ››
45 - What did the rich socialite's parrot
Polly want a cracker, with cavier please!... More ››
46 - Whose parrot sits on his shoulder shouting
Short John Silver!... More ››
47 - Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
get to the chick across the street!... More ››
48 - What profession did the parrot get into when it
swallowed the clock?
Politics... More ››
49 - How do you identify a bald eagle?
feathers are combed over to one side.... More ››
50 - What did they call the canary that flew into the
pastry dish ?
Tweetie Pie !... More ››
51 - What do you get when you cross a chicken
A bird that lays down !... More ››
52 - Why did the chicken cross the road half way
He wanted to lay it on the line !... More ››
53 - What do you get if you cross a chicken
cement mixer ?
A brick-layer !... More ››
54 - Why did a man's
pet vulture not make a sound
for five years?
It was stuffed.... More ››
55 - Why are there no
aspirin in the
The parrots eat em all (Paracetamol)... More ››
56 - What is the definition of a goose ?
that grows down as it grows up !... More ››
57 - Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ?
they're both full of stuffing !... More ››
58 - My parrot lays square eggs but
can only say
Ouch!... More ››
59 - What are a parrot's favourite literary
Mr Macawber and Pollyanna!... More ››
60 - What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top
An eggroll !... More ››
61 - How can you tell if a parrot
It speaks in Polly-syllables!... More ››
62 - What do you call a bunch of chickens playing
Fowl play !... More ››
63 - What do you get if your budgie flies into the
Shredded Tweet !... More ››
64 - What do chicken families do on
They go on peck-nics !... More ››
65 - Why did the chicken cross the "net" ?
wanted to get to the other site !... More ››
66 - What happens when geese land in a volcano ?
They cook their own gooses !... More ››
67 - What flies through the jungle singing opera ?
The parrots of Penzance !... More ››
68 - What do you get if you cross a duck with a
A firequaker !... More ››
69 - What did the parrot say on Independence
Polly wants a firecracker!... More ››
70 - Why did the
bird join he air force?
wanted to be a parrot trooper!... More ››
71 - Q: Why did the turkey cross
prove he wasn't chicken.... More ››
72 - Why did the chicken cross the
To get to the other slide... More ››
73 - Why did the chicken end up in the soup
Because it ran out of cluck !... More ››
74 - What do you get if you
cross a nun and a
A pecking order.... More ››
75 - How do you get a parrot to talk properly ?
Send him to polytechnic !... More ››
76 - Why do parrots carry umbrellas?
So they don't
become polly-saturated!... More ››
77 - How do you stop a rooser crowing
on Sunday ?
Eat him on Saturday !... More ››
78 - What happened when the owl lost his voice ?
He didn't give a hoot !... More ››
79 - Is chicken soup good for
your health ?
if you're the chicken !... More ››
80 - What's the definition of a Parapet?
parrot kept by parachutist!... More ››
81 - What did the parrot say
when he saw a
Polly want a quacker!... More ››
82 - What's a parrot's favourite song?
Parrots in the Springtime!... More ››
83 - When is the best time to buy budgies ?
they're going cheap !... More ››
84 - What's got six legs and can fly long distances ?
Three swallows !... More ››
85 - What do you call a bird that
A mynah bird !... More ››
86 - What happens when a hen eats gunpowder ?
lays hand gren-eggs !... More ››
87 - What birds spend all their time on their knees ?
Birds of prey !... More ››
88 - What happened when the chicken ate cement
She laid a sidewalk !... More ››
89 - What do you call the outside of a hand gren-egg
The bombshell !... More ››
90 - What do you call the place where parrots make
Pollywood!... More ››
91 - What kind of birds do you usually find locked up
Jail-birds !... More ››
92 - Why did the turkey cross the road
prove he wasn't chicken... More ››
93 - Why did the owl, owl ?
Because the woodpecker
would peck 'er !... More ››
94 - Where do the cleverest parrots live?
brain tree forests!... More ››
95 - Where do blind parrots go for treatment?
Birds Eye counter!... More ››
96 - Q: Why do hens lay eggs?
A: If they dropped
them, they'd break... More ››
97 - Q: What is a crowbar?
A: A place were crows go
to get a drink!... More ››
98 - What's the definition of Parity?
exactly the same!... More ››
99 - What happens when you drop a hand gren-egg
It eggs-plodes !... More ››
100 - What geometric figure is like a runaway
A polygon .... More ››
101 - What do you call a woodpecker with no beak ?
A headbanger !... More ››
102 - What happens when ducks fly upside
They quack up !... More ››
103 - Why is it easy for chicks to talk ?
talk is cheep !... More ››
104 - Why do ducks have webbed feet ?
To stamp out
forest fires !... More ››
105 - What is a duck's favorite TV show ?
feather forecast !... More ››
106 - What do chickens serve at birthday
Coop-cakes !... More ››
107 - What do you call a crate of
of quackers !... More ››
108 - What do owls sing when it is raining ?
wet to woo' !... More ››
109 - Where do birds invest their money ?
stork market !... More ››
110 - Teacher: What's a robin?
Fred: A bird that
steals, ma'am.... More ››
111 - What do you call a vulture with no
A head banger.... More ››
112 - What is green and pecks on trees ?
Pickle !... More ››
113 - What's the definition of Polystyrene?
plastic parrot!... More ››
114 - What kind of bird lays electric eggs ?
battery hen !... More ››
115 - How do you get a cut-price parrot ?
bird seed !... More ››
116 - What do you call a very rude
mockingbird !... More ››
117 - What is the definition of Robin ?
A bird who
steals !... More ››
118 - What do you get from a drunk chicken ?
eggs !... More ››
119 - What is a parrot's favorite game ?
Speak !... More ››
120 - What is a parrot's favorite
and Speak!... More ››
121 - What do you call a crazy chicken ?
cluck !... More ››
122 - Why does a rooster watch TV ?
hentertainment !... More ››
123 - Where do birds meet for coffee ?
nest-cafe !... More ››
124 - How long do
chickens work ?
cluck !... More ››
125 - Why don't chickens like people ?
eggs !... More ››
126 - What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
carrot!... More ››
127 - Which bird is always out of breath ?
!... More ››
128 - What language do birds speak ?
!... More ››
129 - What birds are found in Portugal ?
!... More ››
130 - What do you call a Scottish parrot ?
!... More ››
131 - Why did the rooster run away ?
He was chicken
!... More ››
132 - What bird tastes just like butter ?
!... More ››
133 - Which bird ran for President?
Parrot... More ››
134 - How do you make a tame duck wild?
it.... More ››
135 - What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?... More ››
136 - What do Scottish owls sing?
Syne.... More ››
137 - What's a parrot's favourite
Monopoly!... More ››
138 - What do you give a sick bird ?
Tweetment !... More ››
139 - What did the scornful owl say?
Twit twoo.... More ››
140 - What kind of bird opens doors ?
A kiwi !... More ››
141 - What is the
strongest bird ?
A crane !... More ››
142 - What does an educated owl say?
Whom.... More ››
143 - What is a parrot?
A wordy birdy!... More ››