spacer spacer




hair and bald JOKES (random)

Peg-Leg Baldy A bald man with a peg leg gets invited to a costume party.
Being shy and self-conscious about his appearance, he goes to the best costume shop in town.
When he gets there, he tells the shop owner his situation and that he would rather cover his head and leg with a costume instead instead of exploiting his apparent problems.
So, the shop owner comes back with a lifeguard costume.
The man says, "No, no.
That will show off my peg leg.
I can't hide it with that.
Try again." So the shop owner leaves and comes back with a monk costume And again the man says, "No, no.
I can't wear that.
It will make people notice my head." Obviously pissed off, the shop owner leaves and comes back with a five-pound bag of caramels, gives it to the man and says, "Here.
Just take this." Confused, the man says, "What am I suposed to do with a bag of caramels?" Smiling, the shop owner says, "Take home this bag of caramels, melt them, pour it all over your body, stick that peg leg up your ass and tell everyone you're a caramel apple."

  VotarVOTE!   Imprimir PRINT  


 1 - A woman was cutting her husband's thinning hair, when their teenage son arrived home looking for... More ››
 2 - Doctor, doctor, can you give me something for my baldness? How about a few pounds of pig manur... More ››
 3 - America's oldest lady was 115 years old today, and she hasn't got a grey hair on her head. H... More ››
 4 - What do you get if you cross a hairdresser with a werewolf? A monster with an all-over perm.... More ››
 5 - Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her head!... More ››
 6 - Customer: Why doesn't my hairline look good? Barber: It's on the same old head.... More ››
 7 - A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who res... More ››
 8 - Peg-Leg Baldy A bald man with a peg leg gets invited to a costume party. Being shy and self-cons... More ››
 9 - A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the prob... More ››
 10 - A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and... More ››
 11 - A guy admired the hair of three girls. He walked by one and asked, "How'd you get such lovely bl... More ››
 12 - A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment... More ››
 13 - A little girl climbed into her grandfather's lap and studied his white, balding head. She ran... More ››
 14 - two mates at a pub having a beer when the bald one starts complaining about being bald. the othe... More ››
 15 - A guy walks in to the Barbershop. Barber says, "What will it be today?" Guy says, "well I want... More ››
 16 - a guy was teased everywhere of his totally noticably bald head! Afta goin thru yrs of this, he d... More ››
 17 - The Sunday School teacher asked if any of the children's parents had quoted from the Bible in... More ››
 18 - Janet came home from school and asked her mother if the aerosol spray in the kitchen was hair la... More ››
 19 - After accepting an invitation to dance with a rather prematurely balding man a young woman wants... More ››
 20 - A man sitting in a barber's chair noticed that the barber's hands were very dirty. When he comme... More ››
 21 - Barber: And how old are you, little man? Fred: Eight. Barber: And do you want a haircut? F... More ››
 22 - A punk walked into a barber's shop and sat in an empty chair. "Haircut, sir?" asked the barber... More ››
 23 - Barber: Were you wearing a red scarf when you came in? Customer: No. Barber: Oh dear! Then I m... More ››
 24 - How much for a haircut? Barber: Fifteen dollars. How much for a shave? Barber: Ten dollars.... More ››
 25 - Karen: Have you noticed that Daddy is getting taller ? Sharon: No, why ? Karen: His head is st... More ››
 26 - First boy: My dad saw a horrible witch and didn't turn a hair! Second boy: I'm not surprised -... More ››
 27 - What do you call an English teacher, five feet tall, covered from head to toe in boils and tot... More ››
 28 - My barber is a specialist in road map shaves. How come? When he's finished, your face is ful... More ››
 29 - Doctor, Doctor my hair keeps falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in ? Yes, here is... More ››
 30 - Customer: Couldn't you see I was going bald? Barber: No, the shine from your head blinded me.... More ››
 31 - Barber: Your hair is getting grey, Sir. Customer: I'm not surprised - hurry up, will you?... More ››
 32 - If the Pilgrims came over on the Mayflower, how did the barbers arrive? On clipper ships.... More ››
 33 - Why does a barber never shave a man with a wooden leg? Because he always uses a razor.... More ››
 34 - Why did the bald man put a rabbit on his head? Because he wanted a head of hare (hair).... More ››
 35 - What do you get if you cross a hairdresser and a bucket of cement ? Permanent waves !... More ››
 36 - Customer: Why did you take off so much hair? Barber: I didn't, nature beat me to it.... More ››
 37 - Look at that bald man over there. It's the first time I've seen a parting with ears.... More ››
 38 - Teacher: I see you don't cut your hair any longer. Fred: No sir, I cut it shorter.... More ››
 39 - When can you dive in a swimming pool and not get your hair wet ? When your bald !... More ››
 40 - Customer: Why is my hairline receding? Barber: It's not. Your scalp is advancing.... More ››
 43 - Why do polo bears like bald men ? Because they have a great, white, bear place !... More ››
 44 - Q: Why are brunettes so proud of their hair? A: It matches their mustaches.... More ››
 45 - What do you get if you cross a wireless with a hairdresser ? Radio waves !... More ››
 46 - There are three ways a man wears his hair - parted- unparted or departed... More ››
 47 - Why do bald-headed men never use keys? Because they've lost their locks.... More ››
 48 - Why do barbers make good drivers? Because they know all the short cuts.... More ››
 49 - I had a dream you were a tire last night. I woke up and you were bald.... More ››
 50 - What should you buy if your hair falls out ? A good vacuum cleaner !... More ››
 51 - What's a barber's favourite kind of holiday? Cruising on a clipper.... More ››
 52 - Is that your face or are you wearing your hair back to front today?... More ››
 53 - Why was the lady's hair angry? Because she was always teasing it.... More ››
 54 - Knock Knock Who's there ! Barber ! Barber who ? Barberd wire !... More ››
 55 - What do you call a policeman with blonde hair ? A fair cop !... More ››
 56 - Your head is sooooo bald I mistook you for a green rabbit.... More ››
 57 - For what person do all men take off their hats? The barber.... More ››
 58 - Why did the bald man go outside ? To get some fresh hair !... More ››
 59 - What do you call a high-priced barber shop? A clip joint.... More ››
 60 - How does a barber make phone calls? He cuts them short.... More ››
 61 - Who never gets his hair wet in the shower? A bald man.... More ››
 62 - What do you call a proton with big hair? A 'froton.... More ››
 63 - What's your dad getting for Christmas? Bald and fat.... More ››
 64 - What do you call a pen with no hair ? A bald point !... More ››
 65 - What side of a monster has more hair ? The outside !... More ››
 66 - How can you avoid falling hair? Get out of the way.... More ››
 67 - I want a hair cut please. Certainly, which one !... More ››
 68 - Your so bald, I can see what your thinking.... More ››
 69 - What kind of hair do oceans have ? Wavy !... More ››
 70 - Your so bald your bald... More ››
Submit a Joke | Contact | Privacy Policy | Last Update: 2024-02-23