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letter JOKES (random)

Crazy Aunt Maud received a letter one morning, and upon reading it burst into floods of tears.
"What's the matter?" asked her companion.
"Oh dear," sobbed Auntie, "It's my favorite nephew.
He's got three feet." "Three feet?" exclaimed her friend.
"Surely that's not possible?" "Well," said Auntie, "his mother's just written to tell me he's grown another foot !"

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 1 - Where do ghosts mail their letters? At the ghost office.... More ››
 2 - Braxton and Hollis had jobs at a California cotton mill. One morning the foreman came along and... More ››
 3 - Crazy Aunt Maud received a letter one morning, and upon reading it burst into floods of tears.... More ››
 4 - Betty was scribbling industriously over some paper with a pencil when her mother asked her what... More ››
 5 - An old lady walked in to the post office to buy stamps and as she was short-sighted the clerk of... More ››
 6 - An Irishman went into a post office to see if there were any letters for him. "I'll see, sir,"... More ››
 7 - Josh sent a letter to his folks. He told about a ten-mile hike he had taken. His father wrote b... More ››
 8 - Teacher: Frd, give me a sentence starting with "I." Fred: I is . . . Teacher: No, Fred. You... More ››
 9 - Are you writing a thank you letter to Grandma like I told you to? Yes Mom. Your handwriting seem... More ››
 10 - Did you hear about the sister who wrote herself a letter and forgot to sign it and when it arr... More ››
 11 - 1st vampire: How things? 2nd vampire: Terrible! Today I received a letter saying I'm overdrawn... More ››
 12 - Why did the boy jump up and down on the letter? He heard that you have to stamp letters or the... More ››
 13 - Why did the young witch have such difficulty writing letters? She had never learned to spell p... More ››
 14 - What word grows smaller when you add two letters to it? Add "er" to short and it becomes shorte... More ››
 15 - Last night I wrote myself a letter. But I forgot to sign it and now I don't know who it's from.... More ››
 16 - Why do people leave letters at the football ground ? They want to catch the last goal-post !... More ››
 17 - How did skeletons send each other letters in the days of the Wild West? By Bony Express.... More ››
 18 - Why is the letter "t" so important to a stick insect? Without it would be a sick insect.... More ››
 19 - What's a zombie say when he gets a letter from his girlfriend? It's a dead letter day.... More ››
 20 - His girlfriend returned all his letters. I bet she marked them "second class male !"... More ››
 21 - Why is the letter N the most powerful letter? Because it is in the middle of TNT.... More ››
 22 - What's the definition of a school report? A poison pen letter from the principal.... More ››
 23 - Why do postmen carry letters? Because the letters can't go anywhere by themselves.... More ››
 24 - What did the werewolf write at the bottom of the letter? Best vicious . . .... More ››
 25 - What do snakes write on the bottom of their letters? With love and hisses.... More ››
 26 - How many letters are there in the alphabet? Eleven. T-H-E A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.... More ››
 27 - What did the envelope say to the stamp? "Stick with me and we'll go places."... More ››
 28 - What kind of letters did the snake get from his admirers? Fang mail.... More ››
 29 - What letters are not in the alphabet? The ones in the mail, of course!... More ››
 30 - What does an envelope say when you lick it? Nothing. It just shuts up.... More ››
 31 - What did the stamp say to the envelope? "I've become attached to you."... More ››
 32 - What letter should you avoid? The letter A because it makes men mean.... More ››
 33 - What do you call a Welshman who writes lots of letters ? Pen Gwyn !... More ››
 34 - Have you ever seen a duchess? Yes - it's the same as an English "s"... More ››
 35 - What word allows you to take away two letters and get one? Stone.... More ››
 36 - I got an anonymous letter today. Oh, really - who was it from?!... More ››
 37 - Q: Why did the witch's mail rattle? A: It was a chain letter.... More ››
 38 - What two words have thousands of letters in them? Post office.... More ››
 39 - Which two letters of the alphabet are nothing? MT (empty) .... More ››
 40 - What two letters do you say when you answer the phone? LO... More ››
 41 - Where do you put letters to boys? In a mail (male) box.... More ››
 42 - How does a ghost start a letter? Tomb it may concern.... More ››
 43 - When is a letter damp? When it has postage due (dew).... More ››
 44 - What 8-letter word has one letter in it? Envelope.... More ››
 45 - Which two letters are rotten for your teeth? D K... More ››
 46 - Who does Dracula get letters from? His fang club.... More ››
 47 - What letter is like a vegetable? The letter P.... More ››
 48 - What letter stands for the ocean? The letter C.... More ››
 49 - What girl's name is like a letter? Kay (K).... More ››
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