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| The Best Insect Jokes: | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| 1) What did one centipede say to the other centipede ? You've got a lovely pair of... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 2) One ant was running across an unopened box of crackers and urging another to spee... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3) A flea jumped over the swinging doors of a saloon, drank three whiskeys and jumpe... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4) Q: What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? A: "Dead ant, Dead A... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5) What do you get if you cross a spider and an elephant ? I'm not sure, but if you... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 6) Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet ? "Why are we running... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 7) Boy: What's the biggest ant in the world? Girl: My Aunt Boy: No, it's an eleph... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 8) If there are 5 flies in the kitchen how do you know which one is the American Foo... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 9) What is the difference between a flea bitten dog and a bored visitor ? Ones goin... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 10) What is the difference between a flea bitten dog and a bored visitor ? Ones goin... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 11) Surveyor: This house is a ruin. I wonder what stops it from falling down. Owner... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 12) Q: What did one flea say to the other flea when they came out of the movies? - A:... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 13) What did the wife spider say to her husband when he tried to explain why he was l... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 14) Two mosquitoes were buzzing round when they saw a drunken man. One said to the... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 15) What is the difference between an elephant and a flea? An elephant can have flea... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 16) A mother moth was telling her baby moth off saying, "If you don't eat all your co... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 17) What is the difference between a flea and a wolf ? One prowls on the hairy and t... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 18) Why did the firefly keep stealing things ? What goes "snap, crackle and pop" ? A... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 19) What do you get if you cross a firefly and a moth ? An insect who can find its w... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 20) What do you get if you cross a moth with a firefly? An insect that can find its... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 21) What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses ? If one bit you, you coul... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 22) First Caribou: What well-known cartoon character do moths like a hole lot? Secon... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 23) What did the maggot say to his friend when he got stuck in an apple ? Worm your... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 24) What do you get if you cross a tarantula with a rose ? I'm not sure, but I would... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 25) Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team ? He took too long t... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 26) What does a bee say before it stings you ? This is going to hurt me a lot more t... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 27) Why didn't the two worms get on Noah's Ark in an apple ? Because everyone had to... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 28) What happened when the chef found a daddy long legs in the salad ? It became a d... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 29) What is the most faithful insect ? A flea, once they find someone they like they... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 30) How can you tell which end of a worm is which ? Tickle it in the middle and see wh... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 31) Why was the centipede late ? Because he was playing "This little Piggy" with his b... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 32) One woodworm met another. "How's life?" she asked. "Oh, same as usual," he repl... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 33) What buzzes, is black and yellow and goes along the bottom of the sea ? A bee in... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 34) How do we know that insects are so clever ? Because they always know when your eat... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 35) What did the maggot say to another ? What's a nice maggot like you doing in a join... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 36) What did the spider say to the fly ? We're getting married do you want to come to... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 37) First Caribou: What do you call a bee that can't make up his mind? Second Caribo... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 38) Who rode a dog and was a confederate general during the American Civil War ? Rob... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 39) First Caribou: Which bug does amazing motor cycle stunts? Second Caribou: Evel B... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 40) Why did the bees go on strike ? Because they wanted more honey and shorter working... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 41) Why did the queen bee kick out all of the other bees ? Because they kept droning o... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 42) What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken ? Enough drumsticks to feed... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 43) Why don't other bugs like earwigs ? Because they are always earwigging their conve... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 44) What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant ? Very big worm holes in you... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 45) What did one flea say to the other after a night out ? Shall we walk home or tak... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 46) What did the worm say to the other when he was late home ? Where in earth have y... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 47) Why is it best to be bitten quickly by one mosquito? Because an itch in time sa... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 48) What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly ? Try sewing buttons on a mo... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 49) How do stones stop moths eating your clothes ? Because rolling stones gather no... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 50) What did one mosquito say to another when they came out of the cinema? Fancy a b... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 51) What is black and yellow and buzzes along at 30,000 feet ? A bee is an aeroplane... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 52) What is worse than an alligator with toothache ? A centipede with athlete's foot... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 53) How do you know if you have a tough mosquito ? You slap him and he slaps you back... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 54) How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm ? it has a blue light... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 55) Why were the flies playing football in saucer ? They where playing for the cup !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 56) What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect ? The Masked-quito !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 57) QUESTION: What do you get from a bee that has an udder? ANSWER: Milk and honey.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 58) What are ants called when they run away very fast to get married? Ant-elopers.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 59) Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet ? He wanted to see the floor show !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 60) What do bees do if they want to use public transport ? Wait at a buzz stop !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 61) How do you make a glow worm happy ? Cut off his tail, he'll be de-lighted !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 62) Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest? Because she was a litter bug.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 63) How do you make a butterfly ? Flick it out of the butter dish with a knife !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 64) How do you spot a modern spider ? He doesn't have a web he had a website !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 65) First Caribou: Which bug gobbles up trash? Second Caribou: The litterbug.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 66) Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag ? They can lighten your load !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 67) What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him ? He's bee-witched !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 68) What happened to the man who turned into an insect ? He just beetled off !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 69) Why was the glow worm unhappy ? Because her children weren't that bright !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 70) What goes 99-clonk, 99-clonk, 99-clonk ? A centipede with a wooden leg !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 71) What's a glow worms favourite song ? Wake me up before you glow glow !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 72) What is a flea's favourite book ? The itch-hikers guide to the galaxy !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 73) What do you get if you cross a glow worm with some beer ? Light ale !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 74) What did the woodworm say to the chair ? It's been nice gnawing you !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 75) Can bees fly in the rain ? Not without their little yellow jackets !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 76) What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat ? A dirty kid !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 77) If a flea and a fly pass each other what time is it? Fly past flea.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 78) What do you get if you cross a bee with a door bell? A hum dinger !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 79) Why was the moth so unpopular ? He kept picking holes in everything !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 80) What does a caterpillar do on New Years Day ? Turns over a new leaf !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 81) Why did the spider buy a car ? So he could take it out for a spin !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 82) What's black, yellow and covered in blackberries ? A bramble bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 83) What goes "snap, crackle and pop" ? A firefly with a short circuit !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 84) Why don't anteaters get sick? Because they're full of anty-bodies !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 85) What is a bee's favourite classical music composer ? Bee-thoven !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 86) What's more dangerous than being with a fool ? Fooling with a bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 87) What did the bee to the other bee in summer ? Swarm here isn't it !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 88) What's a bee-line ? The shortest distance between two buzz-stops !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 89) How do you find where a flea has bitten you ? Start from scratch !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 90) What does a spider do when he gets angry ? He goes up the wall !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 91) What does a queen bee do when she burps ? Issues a royal pardon !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 92) Q: What kind of suit does a bee wear to work? A: A buzzness suit!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 93) What do you get when you cross a bell with a bee? A humdinger.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 94) What do you get if you cross a rabbit and a flea ? Bugs Bunny !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 95) Why did the bee started talking poetry ? He was waxing lyrical !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 96) What is the definition of a caterpillar ? A worm in a fur coat !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 97) What did the earwig say as it fell down the stairs ? Ear we go !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 98) Why do worms taste like chewing gum ? Because they're wrigleys !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 99) What did the bee say to the naughty bee ? Bee-hive yourself !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 100) What did the spider say when he broke his new web ? Darn it !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 101) Why are mosquitoes annoying? Because they get under your skin.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 102) What did the spider say to the bee ? Your honey or your life !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 103) What kind of bee can keep an aeroplane dry ? An aero-drone !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 104) Why did the mosquito go to the dentist ? To improve his bite !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 105) What insect lives on nothing ? A moth, because it eats holes... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 106) What do you call a grasshopper with no legs ? A grasshover !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 107) What do you call A Tale of Two Mosquitoes? A bite-time story.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 108) Why do bees have sticky hair ? Beacuse of the honey combs !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 109) What do you call a 100 spiders on a tyre ? A spinning wheel !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 110) What insect lives on nothing? A moth, because it eats holes.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 111) What is red and dangerous ? Strawberry and tarantula jelly !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 112) What is the wasps' favorite song? Just a Spoonful of Sugar.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 113) What do you call an ant with frog's legs? An antphibian.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 114) Where would you put an injured insect ? In an antbulance !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 115) What has 6 legs, bits and talks in code ? A morese-quito !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 116) What is a spiders favourite TV show ? The newly web game !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 117) How can you make a moth ball ? Hit it with a fly swatter.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 118) How does a queen bee get around her hive ? She's throne !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 119) What did one firefly say to the other ? Got to glow now !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 120) How do you make a moth bawl? Hit him with a fly swatter.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 121) What kind of bees hum and drop things ? A fumble bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 122) Why do bees hum ? Because they've forgotten the words !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 123) Why are spiders good swimmers ? They have webbed feet !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 124) What do you call a big irish spider ? Paddy long legs !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 125) What did the confused bee say ? To bee or not to bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 126) How many bees do you need in a bee choir ? A humdred !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 127) What kind of doctors are like spiders ? Spin doctors !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 128) Why are spiders like tops ? They are always spinning !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 129) How do fireflies start a race? Ready, steady, glow!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 130) What kind of bee can't be understood ? A mumble bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 131) How do you start an insect race ? One, two, flea - go... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 132) What pillar doesn't need holding up ? A caterpillar !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 133) What is the biggest ant in the world ? An elephant !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 134) Who writes books for little bees ? Bee-trix Potter !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 135) Who is the bees favourite pop group ? The bee gees !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 136) What's a bees favourite novel ? The Great Gats-bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 137) What is a mosquito's favourite sport ? Skin-diving !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 138) What is the most religious insect ? A mosque-ito !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 139) What's the biggest moth in the world ? A mammoth !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 140) What kind of bugs bother sporting dogs? Ath-fleats!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 141) Who is a bee's favourite painter ? Pablo Beecasso !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 142) How do fireflies start a race ? Ready steady glow !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 143) What has 50 legs but cant walk ? Half a centipede !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 144) What did the bee say to the flower ? Hello honey !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 145) What to you call a Russian flea ? A Moscow-ito !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 146) What has antlers and sucks blood ? A moose-quito !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 147) What do you call a scruffy, lazy ant? Decadant.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 148) How do fireflies lose weight? They burn calories.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 149) What goes hum-choo, hum choo? A bee with a cold !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 150) Where do bees keep their money ? In a honey box !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 151) Which fly captured the ladybird? The dragon-fly.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 152) What has four wheels and flies ? A rubbish bin !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 153) What bee is good for your health ? Vitamin bee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 154) What does a bee get at McDonalds ? A humburger !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 155) What does the bee Santa Claus say ? Ho hum hum !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 156) What insect runs away from everything ? A flee !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 157) Why are mosquitos religious ? They prey on you !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 158) What does a cat go to sleep on ? A caterpillow !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 159) What's a bees favourite flower ? A bee-gonias !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 160) What goes zzub, zzub ? A bee flying backwards !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 161) Why do bees buzz ? Because they can't whistle !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 162) What TV station do bees watch ? Bee bee c one!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 163) What do insects learn at school ? Mothmatics !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 164) What are the cleverest bees ? Spelling bees !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 165) What is the bees favourite film ? The Sting !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 166) What makes a glow worm glow ? A light meal !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 167) What is life like for a wood worm ? Boring !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 168) What are spiders webs good for ? Spiders !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 169) Where do you take a sick wasp? To waspital.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 170) Who is the bees favourite singer ? Sting !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 171) Where do bees go on holiday ? Stingapore !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 172) Which fly makes films ? Stephen Speilbug !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 173) What kind of wig can hear ? An earwig !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 174) What lives in gum trees ? Stick insects !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 175) What do you call a stupid ant? Antwerp.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 176) What is a baby bee ? A little humbug !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 177) How to fleas travel ? Itch hiking !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 178) How to fleas travel ? Itch hiking !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 179) What do bees chew ? Bumble gum !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 180) Why did the fly fly ?... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
