ANSWER ME THIS
Answer me this
Bar beer booze and fun
Brother and sister
Car and train
Dead and dying
Doctor and nurse
Hair and bald
Heaven and hell
Idiot and fool
Movie and TV
Travel and tourist
PIADAS - Curtas, Loiras, Sogras...
THE BEST FUNNY JOKES!
Military JOKE (1st joke of the minute)
A warrant officer was crossing a road one-day
when a frog called
out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn
into a beautiful
princess". He bent over, picked up the frog and
put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you
kiss me and turn me back
into a beautiful princess, I will stay with
you for one week." The
warrant officer took the frog out of his
pocket, smiled at it and returned it
to his pocket.
then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
I'll stay with you for one week and do ANYTHING you want." Again
warrant officer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back
into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter?
I've told you I'm a
beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for
a week and do anything
you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The warrant officer said, "Look I'm an warrant officer. I dont have
time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's
Birthday JOKE (2nd joke of the minute)
Home - A -
excellent essay for someone your age," said the English
"How about for someone my Mum's age, Miss?"
school, Simon," said the nursery school teacher to the
"How old are you?" "I'm not old," said Simon. "I'm nearly
Miss Jones agreed to be interviewed by Fred for the school
"How old are you, ma'am?" asked Fred.
"I'm not going
to tell you that," she replied.
"But Mr Hill the technical teacher
and Mr Hill the geography teacher
told me how old they were."
"Oh well," said Miss Jones. "I'm the same age as both of them."
poor teacher was not happy when she saw what Fred wrote:
Jones, our English teacher, confided in me that she was as old as
"Now remember, boys and girls," said the science
teacher, "you can
tell a tree's age by counting the rings in
a cross section. One ring
for each year."
Fred went home for
tea and found a chocolate roll on the table.
"I'm not eating that,
Mum!" she said. "It's five years old."
You've left all your crusts, Fred. When I was your age I ate
Fred: Do you still like crusts, Grandma?
Grandma: Yes, I do.
Fred: Well, you can have mine.
How old is your
From which direction?
eminent old man was being interviewed, and was asked if it was
that he had just celebrated his ninety-ninth birthday.
right,' said the old man. `Ninety-nine years old, and I
enemy in the world. They're all dead.'
`Well, sir,' said the
interviewer, `I hope very much to have the
honour of interviewing
you on your hundredth birthday.'
The old man looked at the young
man closely, and said, `I can't see
why you shouldn't. You
look fit and healthy to me!'
- Humor is a universal language
( Sent by John)
- Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost.
( Sent by David)
- Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly; devils fall because of their gravity.
( Sent by Robin)
- We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
( Sent by Will)
- Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
( Sent by Arnold)
- The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.
( Sent by Bill)
- I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup.
( Sent by Margaret)
- Humour is to be brave enough to laugh of one self.
( Sent by Riley)
- Humor is like salt from mother earth. And those salted very well will stay fresh for long time.
( Sent by Jan Neruda)
- Having a 'sense of humor' means that you are a funny person and make good jokes. All in all humor is comedy and funniness!
( Sent by Saffron)
- Have a better definition? Share it!