ANSWER ME THIS
Answer me this
Bar beer booze and fun
Brother and sister
Car and train
Dead and dying
Doctor and nurse
Hair and bald
Heaven and hell
Idiot and fool
Movie and TV
Travel and tourist
PIADAS - Curtas, Loiras, Sogras...
THE BEST FUNNY JOKES!
Dead and dying JOKE (1st joke of the minute)
A woman goes into a funeral home to make
husband's funeral. She tells the director
that she wants her husband
to be buried in a dark blue
He asks, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him in the black
that he's wearing?"
But she insists that it must be a blue suit
and gives him a blank
check to buy one.
When she comes back
for the wake, she sees her husband in the coffin
and he is wearing a
beautiful blue suit. She tells the director how
much she loves the
suit and asks how much it cost.
He says, "Actually, it didn't
cost anything. The funniest thing
happened. As soon as you left,
another corpse was brought in, this one
wearing a blue suit. I noticed
that they were about the same size, and
asked the other widow if she
would mind if her husband were buried in
a black suit. She said that
was fine with her. So... I switched the
Marriage JOKE (2nd joke of the minute)
were on their honeymoon. The
husband was sitting in the bathroom on the
edge of the bathtub
saying to himself, "Now how can I tell my wife that
I've got really
smelly feet and that my socks absolutely stink? I've
managed to keep
it from her while we were dating, but she's bound to
sooner or later that my feet stink. Now how do I tell
Meanwhile, the wife was sitting in the bed saying to herself, "Now how
tell my husband that I've got really bad breath? I've been very
lucky to keep it from him while we were courting, but as soon as he's
lived with me for a week, he's bound to find out. Now how do I tell
The husband finally plucks up enough courage to
tell his wife and so he
walks into the bedroom. He walks over to
the bed, climbs over to his
wife, puts his arm around her neck, moves
his face very close to hers and
says, "Darling, I've a c
onfession to make."
And she says, "So have I, love."
which he replies, "Don't tell me, you've eaten my socks."
- Humor is a universal language
( Sent by John)
- Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost.
( Sent by David)
- Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly; devils fall because of their gravity.
( Sent by Robin)
- We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
( Sent by Will)
- Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
( Sent by Arnold)
- The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.
( Sent by Bill)
- I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup.
( Sent by Margaret)
- Humour is to be brave enough to laugh of one self.
( Sent by Riley)
- Humor is like salt from mother earth. And those salted very well will stay fresh for long time.
( Sent by Jan Neruda)
- Having a 'sense of humor' means that you are a funny person and make good jokes. All in all humor is comedy and funniness!
( Sent by Saffron)
- Have a better definition? Share it!