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teeth JOKES (random)

Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes.
"What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice," she maliciously remarked.
"Are they real?" Yes, nodded Lady Peel.
"Of course," the dowager declared, "you can always tell real pearls by biting them.
May I try?" "Gladly," Lady Peel replied.
"But remember, Duchess, you can't tell real pearls with false teeth."

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 1 - What did one tooth say to the other? Get your cap on, the dentist is taking us out tonight.... More ››
 2 - Why is a toothless dog like a tree? It has more bark than bite.... More ››
 3 - What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? T... More ››
 4 - What happened to the man who put his false teeth in backwards? He ate himself!... More ››
 5 - Why is 4,840 square yards like a bad tooth ? Because it is an acre.... More ››
 6 - A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down... More ››
 7 - A man coughed violently, and his false teeth shot across the room and smashed against the wall.... More ››
 8 - Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her throu... More ››
 9 - What sort of an act do you do? I bend over backwards and pick up a handkerchief with my teeth.... More ››
 10 - "Your teeth are like the stars," he said, As he pressed her hand, so white. He spoke the truth... More ››
 11 - Willie: "I have an awful toothache." Tommie: "I'd have it taken out if it was mine." Willie: "... More ››
 12 - What's the difference between a vampire with toothache and a rainstorm? One roars with pain an... More ››
 13 - Why do you forget a tooth, as soon as the dentist pulls it out? Because it goes right out of y... More ››
 14 - Patient: Tell me honestly, how am I? Dentist: Your teeth are fine, but your gums will have to co... More ››
 15 - What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano? He said, "Darling, you've got lovely... More ››
 16 - Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed? To catch her false teeth... More ››
 17 - What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out? He ate the dentist.... More ››
 18 - Fan: I've always admired you. Are your teeth your own? Actor: Whose do you think they are?... More ››
 19 - What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth? Tooth (truth) or Consequences.... More ››
 20 - What comes out at night and goes Munch, munch, ouch! A vampire with a rotten tooth.... More ››
 21 - What do you get it you cross a porcupine with a giraffe? A long necked toothbrush.... More ››
 22 - Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?...Son: I don't know. The dentist kept it... More ››
 23 - Why didn't the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren't loose.... More ››
 24 - Why does a vampire clean his teeth three times a day? To prevent bat breath.... More ››
 25 - What did one tooth say to the other tooth? "Thar's gold in them thar fills."... More ››
 26 - What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth? Hard cheese.... More ››
 27 - Why did the termite eat a sofa and two chairs? It had a suite tooth.... More ››
 28 - What did the vampire call his false teeth? A new fangled device.... More ››
 29 - How does Snoop Dogg keep his canine teeth white? BLEEEEEE-YATCH!... More ››
 30 - How can you get a set of teeth put in for free? Smack a monster.... More ››
 31 - What do you get if you cross teeth with candy ? Dental floss !... More ››
 32 - Why are vampires like false teeth? They all come out at night.... More ››
 33 - Why are false teeth like stars? Because they come out at night.... More ››
 34 - What's the best thing to put into a pizza? Your teeth.... More ››
 35 - What did the tooth say to the dentist? "Fill 'er up!"... More ››
 36 - What helps keep your teeth together? Toothpaste.... More ››
 37 - What has teeth but no mouth? A comb or a saw.... More ››
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