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The Best Bed Jokes: |
| 1) A little
boy came downstairs crying late one
night.
"What's... Show more |
| 2) Two friends who lived in the town were chatting.
"I've just b... Show more |
| 3) I'd love you to stay the night, but I'm
afraid you'll have to... Show more |
| 4) Three boys were sharing
the same bed on
holiday, but it was s... Show more |
| 5) A neighbour bumped into Jenny playing outside her
house after... Show more |
| 6) I woke up, went for a walk, my head fell off
and rolled away.... Show more |
| 7) I don't think my Mom knows much about
children.
Why do you... Show more |
| 8) Doctor, doctor, I keep dreaming there are great,
gooey, bug-eye... Show more |
| 9) Doctor, doctor, I'm having difficulty sleeping.
Doctor: Well... Show more |
| 10) You can't have any more chocolates tonight. It's
not
good for... Show more |
| 11) The
hotel we stayed in for our holiday offered
bed and board,... Show more |
| 12) Did you hear about the granny who plugged her
electric blanke... Show more |
| 13) Counselor: How many times did I tell you to make
your bed?
Jan... Show more |
| 14) Sonny: I can't sleep. What should I
do?
Counselor: Lie near th... Show more |
| 15) I'd like to buy a bed,
please.
Certainly,
madam. Spring mat... Show more |
| 16) Witch: Doctor, doctor, I don't feel well.
Doctor: Don't worry... Show more |
| 17) I was once in a play called
Breakfast In Bed.
Did you have... Show more |
| 18) Why did your sister keep running
around her
bed ?
Because sh... Show more |
| 19) Mother: Did you make your bed today?
Daughter:
Yes, Mom, but I... Show more |
| 20) How do you know when there is an elephant under
your bed ?
W... Show more |
| 21) When Mr Maxwell's wife left him,
he couldn't
sleep.
Why was... Show more |
| 22) Why did the girl put her bed in the fireplace?
Because she wa... Show more |
| 23) What should you do if you find a 500-pound dog
asleep on your... Show more |
| 24) Father: Why did you put a toad in your sister's
bed?
Son: I c... Show more |
| 25) Why
does your brother wear a life jacket in
bed?
Because he... Show more |
| 26) Shall I tell you the joke about the bed?
No,
because it hasn'... Show more |
| 27) Why did the boy take the ruler to
bed?
He
wanted to see how... Show more |
| 28) What should you do if you find a snake in your bed?
Sleep in... Show more |
| 29) Why did the girl take a ruler to bed?
She
wanted to see how lo... Show more |
| 30) What do you call a python with a great bedside
manner?
A sn... Show more |
| 31) Knock Knock
Who's there !
Bed !
Bed who
?
Bed you can't gue... Show more |
| 32) Why did the composer spend all his time in
bed?
He wrote sh... Show more |
| 33) When does a bed grow longer?
At night, because
two feet are ad... Show more |
| 34) When is your mind like a
rumpled bed?
When
it isn't made up... Show more |
| 35) Why did the kid punch the bed?
His mother told
him to hit the... Show more |
| 36) Why shouldn't you believe a
person in
bed?
Because he is lyi... Show more |
| 37) What is the softest bed for a
baby to sleep
on?
Cot-on-wool... Show more |
| 38) What animal always goes to bed
with its shoes
on ?
A horse... Show more |
| 39) Why did the man take a pencil to
bed ?
To
draw the curtains... Show more |
| 40) Why do people go to bed?
Because the bed
won't come to them.... Show more |
| 41) Why are rivers lazy?
Because they never get off
their beds.... Show more |
| 42) Why do you go to bed?
Because the bed will not
come to you.... Show more |
| 43) What should you do if you find a witch in your bed?
Run!... Show more |
| 44) Why did the bed spread?
Because it saw the
pillow slip.... Show more |
| 45) How can you shorten a bed?
Don't sleep long
in it.... Show more |
| 46) How can you shorten a bed?
Don't sleep long in
it.... Show more |
| 47) Who stole the sheets from the bed?
Bed
buglars.... Show more |
| 48) What do tigers wear in bed ?
Stripey pyjamas
!... Show more |
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