Jokes





spacer
spacer spacer

VISITED
FARMER

JOKES
BLOND
YO MOMMA
BIRTHDAY
KNOCK KNOCK
ANSWER ME THIS

FARMER JOKES!

farmer JOKES (random)

A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspection of the place. The farmer had genuinely tried to be friendly to his new mother-in-law, hoping that it could be a friendly, non-antagonistic relationship. All to no avail though, as she kept nagging them at every opportunity, demanding changes, offering unwanted advice, and generally making life unbearable to the farmer and his new bride. While they were walking through the barn, during the forced inspection, the farmer's mule suddenly reared up and kicked the mother-in-law in the head, killing her instantly. It was a shock to all no matter their feelings toward her demanding ways. At the funeral service a few days later, the farmer stood near the casket and greeted folks as they walked by. The pastor noticed that whenever a woman would whisper something to the farmer, he would nod his head yes a nd say something. Whenever a man walked by and whispered to the farmer, however, he would shake his head no, and mumble a reply. Very curious as to this bizarre behavior, the pastor later asked the farmer what that was all about. The farmer replied, "The women would say, 'What a terrible tragedy' and I would nod my head and say, 'Yes, it was.' The men would then ask, 'Can I borrow that mule?' and I would shake my head and say, 'Can't. It's all booked up for a year.'"

  VotarVOTE!   Imprimir PRINT  
Enviar
  ImprimirEMBED  
 

THE COMPLETE LIST OF FUNNY farmer JOKES:

 1 - Q: Why did the farmer call his pig "Ink"? A: Because it was always running out of the pen.... More ››
 2 - A lone tourist who is passing through the suburbs on the way to town by car, unfortunately exper... More ››
 3 - Farmer Brown decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking com... More ››
 4 - A farmer lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an... More ››
 5 - A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspectio... More ››
 6 - A man from the city is out plowing his field and gets his tractor stuck in the wet ground. A... More ››
 7 - A very zealous soul-winning young preacher recently came upon a farmer working in his field. Bei... More ››
 8 - Seems a guy was driving for hours thu desolate country when he passed a farmhouse, and before he... More ››
 9 - A hindu priest, rabbi and a lawyer were driving down the road, when the car breaks down. Fortuna... More ››
 10 - There was a farmer who had a herd of pigs. One day someone went to the farm and asked the farm... More ››
 11 - A farmer purchased an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterp... More ››
 12 - A jogger running down a country road is startled as a horse yells at him "Hey-come over hear bud... More ››
 13 - A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They cam... More ››
 14 - A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They cam... More ››
 15 - Rush Limbaugh and his chauffeur were out driving in the country and accidentally hit and kille... More ››
 16 - There was a farmer who raised watermelons. He was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak i... More ››
 17 - A farmer gets sent to jail, and his wife is trying to hold the farm together until her husband... More ››
 18 - An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to... More ››
 19 - This farmer has 500 hens but no rooster so he goes to his neighbor and asks him if he could buy... More ››
 20 - A clergyman walking down a country lane and sees a young farmer struggling to load hay back onto... More ››
 21 - A New York City yuppie moved to the country and bought a piece of land. He went to the local fee... More ››
 22 - A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he... More ››
 23 - A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talkin... More ››
 24 - A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talk... More ››
 25 - There was a farmer who had a lot of live stock. He had cows, horses, chickens, pigs, and bulls.... More ››
 26 - The farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chicken's his father had entrus... More ››
 27 - A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the... More ››
 28 - A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge fi... More ››
 29 - A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of... More ››
 30 - A bus load of politicians were driving down a country road one afternoon, when all of a sudden,... More ››
 31 - A man's car stalled on a country road one morning. When the man got out to fix it, a cow came al... More ››
 32 - An accountant is in a car travelling with a farmer client around his farm. They pass a large... More ››
 33 - Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later b... More ››
 34 - A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The... More ››
 35 - An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wi... More ››
 36 - A farmer was interviewing a young man for the job of assistant farmhand. `You'll need to be f... More ››
 37 - On a drive in the country, a city slicker noticed a farmer lifting a pig up to an apple tree and... More ››
 38 - Liam had left Dublin to go up to Belfast for a bit of skydiving, Late Sunday evening he was foun... More ››
 39 - A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew in... More ››
 40 - A farmer and his girlfriend were out for a stroll in the fields when they came across a cow and a... More ››
 41 - An agriculture student said to a farmer: "Your methods are too old fashioned. I won't be surpris... More ››
 42 - A farm boy was drafted. On his first furlough, his Father asked him what he thought of Army life... More ››
 43 - On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife... More ››
 44 - FARMER: Did you sleep well last night? GUEST: No, the bed was soft and the air was fresh, but an... More ››
 45 - Farmer Jones bought a herd of pigs from a Roman farmer who moved into the next valley and boy, i... More ››
 46 - Camp Woodland was across the road from a dairy farm. One day the kids saw a large bull. 'Is tha... More ››
 47 - Did you hear about the farmer's boy who hated the country ? He went to the big city and got a jo... More ››
 48 - Farmer Brown put up a pig-shaped weather vane, but he's not happy with it. Instead of pointing... More ››
 49 - Farmer Giles is so interested in conserving energy, he built a pig-powered car. He has to get... More ››
 50 - "Tell me," said the hiker to the local farmer, "will this pathway take me to the main road?" "... More ››
 51 - What is the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer? A dressmaker sews what she gathers, a... More ››
 52 - What did the farmer say when his fat pig wouldn't fit into the pen? "There's more there than m... More ››
 53 - Did you hear about the farmer you ploughed his field with a steamroller ? He wanted to grow mas... More ››
 54 - Did you hear about the farmer who fed crayons to his chickens? He wanted them to lay coloured... More ››
 55 - What did the farmer say when all his cows charged him at once ? I'm on the horns of a dilemma h... More ››
 56 - Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar ? He wanted sweet and sour pork !... More ››
 57 - Why was the farmer hopping mad ? Because someone had trodden on his corn !... More ››
 58 - Camper: Is it easy to milk a cow? Farmer: Sure it is. Any jerk can do it.... More ››
 59 - Q: When is a farmer like a magician? A: When he turns his cow to pasture.... More ››
 60 - What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer? You take me for grunted.... More ››
 61 - What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? Wheres my tractor!... More ››
 62 - Q: Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain? A: He has got no beef.... More ››
 63 - How does the pig farmer get to the fair? He rides piggyback.... More ››
 64 - How did the aliens hurt the farmer? They trod on his corn.... More ››
 65 - Why are farmers cruel? Because they pull corn by the ears.... More ››
 66 - What do you call an Arab dairy farmer? A milk sheik.... More ››
 67 - How does a farmer send messages? By e-i-e-i-o-mail.... More ››
Submit a Joke | Contact | Privacy Policy | Last Update: 2017-08-17