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The Best Fishing Jokes: |
| 1) One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful
beach, with his... Show more |
| 2) Many years ago, a fisherman's wife blessed
her husband with t... Show more |
| 3) An Irish priest loved to fly
fish, it was
an obsession of his... Show more |
| 4) A man was stopped by a game-warden in Northern
Algonquin Park... Show more |
| 5) Three guys were fishing in a lake one day,
when an angel appe... Show more |
| 6) A couple of young guys were fishing
at
their special pond off... Show more |
| 7) Two young men were out in the woods on a
camping trip, when
t... Show more |
| 8) MacAndrews was visiting his Irish cousin,
O'Bannon. While the... Show more |
| 9) There was a salmon fisherman who was out in
the
ocean fishing... Show more |
| 10) Two Irishmen were walking down the street with
two salmon eac... Show more |
| 11) It was well known that a certain lake was very
poor for
fishi... Show more |
| 12) Standing at the
edge of the lake, a man
saw a woman flailing... Show more |
| 13) Two Virginia rednecks go on
a fishing
trip. They rent all the... Show more |
| 14) A father and son went fishing one day. While
they were
out in... Show more |
| 15) Three
fishermen were fishing when they
came upon a mermaid, t... Show more |
| 16) While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a
tourist capsize... Show more |
| 17) Three
priests were fishing on a boat when
they ran out of bai... Show more |
| 18) Having arrived at the edge of the river, the
fisherman soon r... Show more |
| 19) One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman
drilled a
hole in t... Show more |
| 20) Bob is sitting on the ice all day fishing with
no luck, not e... Show more |
| 21) The fishing season hasn't opened and a
fisherman who doesn't... Show more |
| 22) Fishing season hasn't opened and a fisherman
who doesn't have... Show more |
| 23) Two blondes rented a fishing boat, and were
having a great da... Show more |
| 24) Henry's son, David, burst into the
house,
crying. His mother... Show more |
| 25) One man's hobby was fishing, he spent all
his weekends near t... Show more |
| 26) Far away in the tropical waters of the
Caribbean, two prawns... Show more |
| 27) A small town Doctor was famous in the area for
always catchin... Show more |
| 28) Two guys are talking about fishing. One says
to the other, "I a... Show more |
| 29) One day, two guys Joe and Bob
were out
fishing. A funeral ser... Show more |
| 30) Two fishermen were out
on the lake when
one of them dropped h... Show more |
| 31) A priest was walking along the cliffs at Dover
when he came u... Show more |
| 32) George went fishing, but at the end of the day
he had not cau... Show more |
| 33) A fisherman returned to shore with a giant
marlin that was bi... Show more |
| 34) An old
lady saw a little boy with a
fishing-rod over his shou... Show more |
| 35) Tim once took his small cousin with him while
he went
fishing... Show more |
| 36) Fishing rule #1: The least experienced
fisherman always catch... Show more |
| 37) The little kid sat on the side of the road
with a fishing line... Show more |
| 38) "Do you really believe your husband when he
tells you he goes... Show more |
| 39) A guy
rings his boss and says "I can't
come to work today... Show more |
| 40) Q: How many anglers does
it take to change
a light bulb?
A:... Show more |
| 41) A
man was fishing in the jungle. After a
while another angler... Show more |
| 42) Heard the one about the three blondes that
went ice fishing a... Show more |
| 43) "I didn't see you in church last Sunday,
Nigel. I
hear you we... Show more |
| 44) "I
caught a twenty pound salmon last
week."
"Were there a... Show more |
| 45) Mother
to daughter advice: Cook a man a
fish and you feed him... Show more |
| 46) "What's the biggest fish you ever caught?"
"That would be the... Show more |
| 47) Retired colonel, talking of the good old days:
Have you ever... Show more |
| 48) How much fishing tackle can a man accumulate
before his wife... Show more |
| 49) How many South Dakotans does it take to go ice
fishing?
Four.... Show more |
| 50) How many fishermen does it take to change a
light bulb?
One,... Show more |
| 51) Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea
?
Because they... Show more |
| 52) What is the difference between a fisherman
and a lazy student... Show more |
| 53) Q: What you get when four men go fishing and
one
comes back n... Show more |
| 54) What's the difference between an angler and a
dunce?
One ba... Show more |
| 55) What did Noah do while spending time on the
ark ?
Fished, but... Show more |
| 56) If you're fishing on ice, you should
never
tell a joke on ice... Show more |
| 57) I was given the ultimatum 3
weeks ago. She
said "it's me or y... Show more |
| 58) What do you get if you cross a salmon, a
bird's leg
and a han... Show more |
| 59) Two parrots are sitting on a perch. The
first one says to the... Show more |
| 60) Why are fish cleverer than humans?
Ever
seen a fish spend a fo... Show more |
| 61) What fish sounds like a telephone?
Herring, herring...herring... Show more |
| 62) Why men like to fishing so much?
They
finally found something... Show more |
| 63) What bit of fish doesn't make sense ?
The
piece of cod that p... Show more |
| 64) What do you call a big fish who makes you an
offer you can't... Show more |
| 65) I was glad when one fish got
away.
There just wasn't room in... Show more |
| 66) Fisherman: What
are you fishing for sonny?
Boy: I'm not fis... Show more |
| 67) What is dry on the outside, filled with water
and
blows up bu... Show more |
| 68) What do you call a deaf fishing boat
captain?
Anything you l... Show more |
| 69) Lee: I just swallowed a fish bone! Counselor:
Are you choking?... Show more |
| 70) Where do you go to meet the
best fish?
It doesn't matter -... Show more |
| 71) Why are fish boots the warmest ones to wear
?
Because they... Show more |
| 72) Q. What is the difference between a fish and a
piano?
A. Yo... Show more |
| 73) Why do penguins eat fish?
Because donuts
get soggy before the... Show more |
| 74) How did the fish's tail get stuck in
the
anchor chain?
It wa... Show more |
| 75) What did the
fish do when his piano
sounded odd?
He called t... Show more |
| 76) Why are fish no good at tennis?
They don't
like to get too clo... Show more |
| 77) What kind of musical
instrument can you
use for fishing?
Th... Show more |
| 78) What do you get if you cross a trout with an
apartment ?
A... Show more |
| 79) What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks
too much ?
A bee... Show more |
| 80) What did the boy fish say to his girlfriend ?
'Your plaice or... Show more |
| 81) Why are fish so gullible?
They fall for
things hook, line and... Show more |
| 82) Which fish dresses the best?
The Swordfish
- It always looks... Show more |
| 83) When fish play football, who
is the
captain ?
The team's kip... Show more |
| 84) What do romantic fish sing to each other?
Salmon-chanted even... Show more |
| 85) What's the best way to catch a fish?
Have
someone throw it at... Show more |
| 86) Q:what did the fish say when he hit the
concrete wall?
A:... Show more |
| 87) What sort of net is
useless for catching
fish ?
A football n... Show more |
| 88) Have you seen
the new fishing
website?
No, it's not online y... Show more |
| 89) What do you get if you cross
an abbot with
a trout ?
Monkfis... Show more |
| 90) What will santa bring your fish this
christmas?
A scale letr... Show more |
| 91) What do you call a man
with a large
flatfish on his head?
R... Show more |
| 92) Why should you use six hooks on your fishing
line?
eFISHanc... Show more |
| 93) What fish make the best sandwich?
A peanut
butter and jellyfi... Show more |
| 94) How do you post a fish?
You send it COD
... or first bass mai... Show more |
| 95) Why is a fish easy to weigh ?
Because it
has its own scales !... Show more |
| 96) What did the sardine call the
submarine ?
A can of people !... Show more |
| 97) What kind of fish will help you hear better ?
A herring aid !... Show more |
| 98) Q. Where does
a fish keep his
money
A. In the River Bank!... Show more |
| 99) How do you get around fast on the bottom of
the sea?
Skates!... Show more |
| 100) How do fish go into business ?
The start
on a small scale !... Show more |
| 101) Where are most fish found ?
Between the
head and the tail !... Show more |
| 102) What was the name of Tom
Sawyer's
fish?
Huckleberry Fin!... Show more |
| 103) What was the Tsar of Russia's favorite fish ?
Tsardines !... Show more |
| 104) What kind of fish is useful in freezing
weather ?
Skate !... Show more |
| 105) Q:what do you catch when you go ice fishing
A:a cold... Show more |
| 106) How do you communicate
with a fish?
You
drop it a line!... Show more |
| 107) Who sleeps at the bottom of the sea ?
Jack
the kipper !... Show more |
| 108) Why are gold fish orange ?
The water makes
them rusty !... Show more |
| 109) What kind of a fish does
your Parrot sit
on?
A Perch!... Show more |
| 110) What fish goes up the river at 100mph ?
A
motor pike !... Show more |
| 111) What kind of money
do fishermen make ?
Net profits !... Show more |
| 112) What's a sea serpent's favourite
meal?
Fish and ships!... Show more |
| 113) To whom do fish go to borrow money ?
The
loan shark !... Show more |
| 114) Which fish go to heaven when they die ?
Angelfish !... Show more |
| 115) What TV game show do fish like best?
Name
that tuna!... Show more |
| 116) What part of a fish weighs the most ?
It's scales !... Show more |
| 117) Why are fish so smart?
They are always in
schools!... Show more |
| 118) What do you call a literary fish?
Salmon
Rushdie!... Show more |
| 119) What fish do road-menders use ?
Pneumatic
krill !... Show more |
| 120) Which fish can perform operations ?
A
Sturgeon !... Show more |
| 121) What fish is best to have in a boat?
A
Sailfish.... Show more |
| 122) What is a knight's favourite fish?
A
swordfish!... Show more |
| 123) What do you call a fish with no eyes ?
Fish !... Show more |
| 124) What do naked fish play with ?
Bare-a-cudas !... Show more |
| 125) Q. Where do
fish sleep?
A. In a
river bed... Show more |
| 126) How do the fish get to school ?
By octobus
!... Show more |
| 127) What fish only swims at night ?
A starfish
!... Show more |
| 128) What do dirty fish read?
Prawno
Magazines!... Show more |
| 129) How do you
tune a fish?
With its
scales!... Show more |
| 130) Where do fish wash ?
In a river basin !... Show more |
| 131) Where do fish
come from?
Finland!... Show more |
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