Put Horse Jokes on your web pages!  Add to favorites  Home |
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||
| The Best Horse Jokes: | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1) Why is horse racing so romantic? Because the horse hugs the rails, the jockey puts... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 2) Where do you take a sick horse? To the Horspital!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3) A man has a racehorse, never won a race. Man in disgust says," Horse, you win tod... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4) A mean horseman went into a saddler's shop and asked for one spur. "One spur?" as... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5) Did you hear about the Irishman who couldn't tell the difference between his two... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 6) "Will I ever be able to race my horse again" the owner asked the vet. The vet re... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 7) "Will I ever be able to race my horse again" the owner asked the vet. The vet repl... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 8) What did the city worker say after his first ever pony trek? I never knew anythi... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 9) Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette? He di... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 10) What did the wife say to the undertaker when he started hitting his broken down c... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 11) A stallion and a mare where due to get married, but the stallion didn't show up a... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 12) Did you hear about the overweight man who took up horse riding as exercise? The... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 13) Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day? He fell in love w... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 14) You said this horse could jump as high as a ten foot fence and he can't jump at a... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 15) Did you hear about the horse that has made a dozen films? He's not a star though... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 16) What did the horse say to whinnie the pooh while watching his t.v. show? I wish... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 17) What is the strongest animal? A racehorse, because it can take hundreds of peopl... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 18) Girl: We have a mayor. Do you? Horse: Sure! Girl: What do you call it? Horse: Sa... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 19) Did you hear about the race horse that was so late coming in? They had to pay th... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 20) Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing? He was always standin... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 21) Did you find my horse well behaved? Indeed, whenever we came to a fence he let m... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 22) How did the instructor try to make horse riding enjoyable? He tried to stirrup s... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 23) Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back? They're always switching t... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 24) What does it mean if you find a horse shoe? Some poor horse is walking around in h... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 25) What is the difference between a horse and a duck? One goes quick and the other go... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 26) Which route should you take through the woods when riding a fizzy horse? The psy... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 27) What happened to Lady Godiva's horse when he saw she had no clothes on? It made... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 28) Why is Dick Clark a favourite star with horses? Because he was a disk jockey fro... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 29) How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites? They take a gallop... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 30) What has four legs and see just as well from either end? A horse with his eyes c... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 31) Who did the breeder call when his horse was possessed by an evil spirit? An exho... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 32) Why did the horse stir his cereal with his hoof? Because he wanted to feel his o... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 33) Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and hor... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 34) Why did the artist put on a show of horse paintings? He wanted to mount an exhib... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 35) Why did the horseman put a saddle on a large loaf of bread? It was a crusty stee... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 36) Where did the Knights of the Round Table park their horses? In the Sir Lance Lot... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 37) Why did the boy stand behind the horse? He thought he might get a kick out of it!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 38) Why did the farmer call his horse Baseball? Because it's covered with horsehide!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 39) What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air ? A seahorse !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 40) Why did the bareback performer ride his horse? Because it got too heavy to carry.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 41) Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude? He always said "Neigh"... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 42) You said it was a great horse and it is. It took twenty other horses to beat him!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 43) What couple rode a horse up a hill to fetch a pail of water? Jockey and Jill!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 44) What happened to the man who owned a riding academy? Business kept falling off!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 45) How do you make a small fortune out of horses? Start off with a large fortune!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 46) What kind of horse has trouble keeping track of his Macintosh? An Appaloosa!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 47) What do you call a horse that's been all around the world? A globe-trotter!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 48) Why is an egg like a young horse? Because it can't be used until it's broken!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 49) Why is the old, decrepit horse named Flattery? Because it gets you nowhere!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 50) Have you read the book, "100-mile Horse Trek" Who wrote it? Major Bumsore... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 51) What's black and white and turns cartwheels? A piebald horse pulling a cart!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 52) Did you hear about Mike Tyson's horse? It got angry and bit at the champ!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 53) What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse? A tale of whoa!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 54) Did you hear about the aristocratic horse? He was the last of his race!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 55) Why did the man call his horse Fleabag? Because he was often scratched!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 56) What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse? The ground!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 57) What happened to the horse that swallowed a dollar bill? It bucked!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 58) Why is a racehorse like a letter? They both begin a trip at the post!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 59) What do you call a horse that plays the violin? Fiddler on the hoof!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 60) Why is manna from heaven like horse hay? Both are food from aloft!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 61) Why was the racehorse named Bad News? Because bad news travels fast!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 62) What duo were famous for stealing horses? Bonnie and Clydesdale!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 63) What's another name for an assistant stable cleaner? A co-pile-it!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 64) Why are chorus girls like barge horses? They have to tow the line!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 65) As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 66) What is horse sense? Stable thinking and the ability to say nay!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 67) What person strives to ensure safety for horses? Ralph Neighder!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 68) Did you hear about the depressed horse? He told a tale of whoa!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 69) Why was the racehorse names Strawberry Ice? He was a sherbet!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 70) What's as big as a horse, but weighs nothing? A horses shadow!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 71) Why did the horse go behind the tree? To change his jockeys.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 72) What is the slowest racehorse in the world ? A clotheshorse !... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 73) What do you call the horse than lives next door? A neighbour!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 74) What does ever horse and rider do at the same time? Grow old!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 75) What is a jockey's motto? Put your money where your mount is!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 76) Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses? He was a rough rider!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 77) How do you go about hiring a horse? Try two pairs of stilts!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 78) What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds? A zebra!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 79) What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A hoarse horse!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 80) Why are clouds like jockeys? Because they hold the reins!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 81) What is a horses favourite kind of party? A stall ball.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 82) Where did the newlywed horses stay? In the bridle suite!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 83) Why did the horse miss the joust? He had the knight off!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 84) Why was the man sued by his horse? For palomino-money!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 85) Did you hear about the man who named his horse Radish?... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 86) How do you lead a horse to water? With lots of carrots.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 87) What goes into the mouth of a quarter horse? Two bits!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 88) Why was the horse all charged up? It ate some haywire!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 89) How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 90) What is a horse's favourite sport? Stable tennis!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 91) How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 92) What is a horses favourite TV show? Neeeebours... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 93) What disease do horses fear most? Hay Fever!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 94) What do you give a sick horse? Cough stirrup.... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 95) What equine likes to cut in line? A sawhorse!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 96) What is a thespian pony? A little horse play!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 97) When does a horse neigh? Whinny wants to!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 98) What goes "Clip"? A one legged horse!... Read On » | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
