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The Best Phone Jokes: |
| 1) A man and a couple of
his friends had
just finished a round o... Show more |
| 2) After my wife and her former best buddy,
another Air Force wi... Show more |
| 3) After my wife and her former best
buddy, another
Air Force wi... Show more |
| 4) Moody was
awakened by the telephone at
four A.M. It was his K... Show more |
| 5) A psychiatrist was testing the mentality of
a patient.
"Do... Show more |
| 6) At three o'clock one morning a
veterinary surgeon was woken f... Show more |
| 7) Harry was madly in love with Betty, but
couldn't pluck up enoug... Show more |
| 8) Party Host: Hello?
Phone Caller: I'm
trying to reach a Ms. Ni... Show more |
| 9) The new office-boy came
into his boss's
office and said, "I t... Show more |
| 10) The phone in Rigby's Georgia farmhouse rang
one evening. When... Show more |
| 11) Kelso met Hensley on the
street. "Hey!"
said Kelso, "how come... Show more |
| 12) Hello, police? Please send an officer over
to 324 London Road... Show more |
| 13) Caller: Operator! Operator! I don't know
what's wrong with my... Show more |
| 14) Caller: My goodness, Operator! Your nose is
so
stuffed up, I... Show more |
| 15) Who was that on the phone, Fred?
Fred:
No one important. Just... Show more |
| 16) Caller: Operator! Operator! Do you know my
boyfriend's line h... Show more |
| 17) Why did the girl who worked for the
telephone company
sing al... Show more |
| 18) Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a
telephone.
Doctor: Why'... Show more |
| 19) How can you tell if someone who's having a
temper tantrum is... Show more |
| 20) Why did Dr Frankenstein have his telephone
cut off?
Because h... Show more |
| 21) How can you tell if someone who's just had
a perm is on the p... Show more |
| 22) How that we are engaged I hope you'll give
me a ring.
Of cou... Show more |
| 23) Mother: Why was the phone busy all
night?
Babysitter: The fire... Show more |
| 24) What do you call a telephone call from
one vicar to another ?... Show more |
| 25) Caller: Operator! Operator! Call me an
ambulance!
Operator:... Show more |
| 26) What happened to the little frog who sat on
the telephone?... Show more |
| 27) What do you get if you cross a telephone
with a fat football... Show more |
| 28) What do you get if you cross a pig and a
telephone ?
A lot of... Show more |
| 29) If you cross a telephone and a pair of
scissors, what do you... Show more |
| 30) What do you get if you cross a telephone
and a marriage burea... Show more |
| 31) Why did the chicken walk on the telephone
wire?
She wanted to... Show more |
| 32) What do you get when you cross a telephone
with a pair of
pan... Show more |
| 33) What do you get if you cross a phone with a
birthday
celebrat... Show more |
| 34) How do Iranians speak on the
telephone?
Persian-to-Persian (... Show more |
| 35) What asks no question but demands an
answer?
A doorbell or a r... Show more |
| 36) What did the man say when he got a
big
phone bill?
"Who said... Show more |
| 37) What did the answering machine say to the
telephone?
Take m... Show more |
| 38) What do
you call the sound a ghost makes
when he calls you?... Show more |
| 39) What do you get if you cross a
telephone
with an iron?
A sm... Show more |
| 40) What do you get if you cross a telephone
with a
night crawler... Show more |
| 41) If you cross a telephone and a lobster
what will you get?
Sn... Show more |
| 42) How does a baboon make phone calls?
He
just monkeys around on... Show more |
| 43) Why are there so many Johnson
in he
phone book?
They all ha... Show more |
| 44) What do
you get if you cross a phone
with a rooster?
A wake... Show more |
| 45) Why is an engaged girl like a
telephone?
Because they both hav... Show more |
| 46) When doesn't a telephone work
underwater?
When it's wringin... Show more |
| 47) How does a football player make phone calls?
On a touch-down... Show more |
| 48) Why did the alien phone home on his mobile?
Because it was so... Show more |
| 49) How can you tell if a bee is on the phone?
You get a buzzy si... Show more |
| 50) What do you get if you cross a phone with a
mouthwash?
Tele-S... Show more |
| 51) How did the telephones get married ?
In a
double ring ceremony... Show more |
| 52) How do, like, really laid-back types answer
the phone?
Mellow... Show more |
| 53) How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub?
They both have rings... Show more |
| 54) What animals talk on the telephone the most?
The yakety-yaks!... Show more |
| 55) Who invented the telephone?
The
Phoenicians (phone-itions).... Show more |
| 56) What do you call
an elephant in a phone
box?
Stuck.... Show more |
| 57) When does a horse talk on the phone?
Whinny wants to!... Show more |
| 58) What kind of music do phones love to hear?
A symphony... Show more |
| 59) How does a baritone make phone calls?
Song distance!... Show more |
| 60) How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls?
Collect!... Show more |
| 61) How does a skeleton call her friends?
On
a telebone.... Show more |
| 62) How does a cheerleader answer the phone?
H-E-L-L-O!... Show more |
| 63) What do ghosts use to phone home?
A
terror-phone.... Show more |
| 64) How does a door chime answer the phone?
Bella?... Show more |
| 65) How do scaredy-cats answer the phone?
Yellow?... Show more |
| 66) How does a lobster answer the phone?
Shello?... Show more |
| 67) What kind of phone makes music?
A
saxophone.... Show more |
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